Humperdink

Reviews (2)

• Confirmed Guest

  Be aware because it is not stated - There is a Sewerage works in view of the house on the lane coming in and unpleasant smells were present at times when we stayed here. There were mosquitoes & drain flies inside the house and we both got bitten. Also, despite advertising there is a fridge/freezer, there is no fridge freezer, just a single ice box type compartment inside an under counter fridge in the kitchen. The neighbour whose garden is right next to Humperdink has lots of Cats which do keep coming in to the garden which could be a problem for those with dogs reactive to Cats.The road in is single track with no passing places on a section at least 200 metres long. It's so bad the level on one side of the road has dropped away a lot and on the other side has pushed up. There should be a warning for low cars before booking because it could easily damage a car, even driving very slowly.On arrival we found lots of cleaning issues. The fridges in the garage were unusable as they were black inside with mould. The kitchen sink, taps, bath and shower were dirty. There was grit under the sofa covers, thick dust around the floor edges and hair and cobwebs on the light shades. The windows were covered in hand prints & the floors were not mopped as we found out when we ran damp kitchen towel over it. There were crumbs and dead flies on the window sills. The bedding on the single bed smelt stale as if it had been used. We did appreciate the welcome pack the owner left us but we would have preferred a cleaner house instead. We took photos to send to the booking agent as proof of what we had found as the owner didn't reply to our emails once we'd arrived.Prior to arrival we'd asked if the freezer compartment inside the fridge was a proper freezer or an ice box because we had booked a Tesco shop but the owner emailed to say she didn't know but they had never been poisoned and I should move on. Trying to be helpful we let her know the bin men had damaged the green bin but our email went unanswered.  We were not contacted once by the owner for the whole of our stay yet previous guests reported numerous contacts with her asking if everything was ok. This made us feel really unwelcome and uncomfortable. We also didn't appreciate being asked by the owner after booking, what our relationship was and which beds we were sleeping in so they knew which beds to make up when we were paying for the whole house.The stairs are so steep you have to walk up like a duck as the treads are very shallow but there is no mention of this. You are not able to stand up on the landing as the ceiling is so low and the stairs and landing are a fire hazard as they don't meet current safety regulations. There are no mains lights on either the stairs or the landing, just a battery PIR on a ledge near the top so you go up and come down in darkness. The gaps between the spindles on the stairs are more than wide enough for a child to fall through, again this does not meet current safety regulations for holiday lets. The Fire extinguisher was 8 years out of date. There were no guest emergency instructions in the welcome folder on site and the bedroom doors are a fire hazard as they are clogged with paint and don't close. Has a fire assessment ever been carried out on this holiday let?The back garden was full of cracks deep enough to break a dog's leg and the owner had told us it happens after dry weather so why no warning when booking. There were no heating instructions left for us so the Nest ring only seemed to work during unknown preset times and the boiler kept showing a message that it needed a service. All the kitchen cupboards were full of the owners things so there were no cupboards for us to store our own food. The front bedroom light was so dim it was difficult to apply makeup, as was most of the lighting.The reserve appears to be unstaffed and not, as advertised exclusively for members as there is no way to stop non members just walking in, as we witnessed often. Cars were left on the pull in by Humperdink. The owner's notes emphasises the need to drive slowly for the wildlife which we did but the neighbours next door to Humperdink overtook us on the gravel section like a bat out of hell throwing up clouds of dust so they don't seem to appreciate their own lovely environment.We loved the cows and the location was very pleasant and had a nice beach (mind the jelly fish) and the local residents were really helpful, telling us about the area. We got talking to lots of them during our stay but strangely the next door neighbours who have a second key never spoke to us once despite reviews saying how friendly they were yet we were quiet & respectful guests. We can't help but wonder if the owner had warned them off and it made us feel most unwelcome.We have stayed in over 100 Cottages over the years, many through the same booking agent we booked Humperdink with and never had problems like here. We have been returning to one property for 22 years. Having paid over a thousand pounds for a week here and as it is also the owners holiday home we didn't expect to spend so much time cleaning. We are not over zealous regarding cleaning but the photos we are sending to the booking agent back up what we found. We left the property cleaner than we found it.We would certainly return to the area as we loved Essex but we would not return to Humperdink.

• Confirmed Guest

  Wonderfully located and extremely comfortable cottage. All facilities you could need in peaceful surroundings. Very helpful and responsive host. We enjoyed every moment of our visit and would love to stay here again.